Looking above episode 20 - Special Guest - Kalaina Baughman

Part of life and relationship is pain. People move, people die, and people hurt each other.  In those situations, we have choices of how to deal with our pain.  Listen in as Karen and Kalaina discuss how to work through broken relationships and move forward with grace.  *We suggest that you save thirty minutes for discussion in pairs (so each person has 15 minutes to answer the final questions).*

Questions for large group discussion: 

1. Let's talk about the positive. Share how a "friend for a season" impacted your life at just the right time.
2. At the end of the podcast, Kalaina shared, "Do unto others as you wish others had done unto you." Looking back at a pain you felt from a friendship, what did you learn to do differently in the future so you don't hurt others in the same way?
3. Why is it so hard to evaluate and admit our contribution to the friendship breakdown? | Why does Jesus instruct us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us? (Matthew 5:43-48)

Break into pairs now, so everyone has time to share. Please note, that this is a time for self-reflection not for bashing someone who hurt you.  Each person should have about 15 minutes to answer the following questions:

1. Have you had a relationship break down (recently or in the past)?  Describe the situation briefly. What were the circumstances that led to the breakdown?
2. Have you looked honestly at your involvement?  How did you contribute to the breakdown?
3. Have you forgiven your friend?
4. Have you asked for forgiveness?
5. Have you allowed yourself to grieve the loss? What did that look like?
6. What did you do well following the breakdown?  What could you have done better?
7. Are you able to pray for that friend?  If you see her do you think positive/neutral/negative thoughts about her?
8. Have you built walls around yourself? Did you get comfortable in your grief?
9. What did you learn from that friendship break-up?  What will you do better in the future?

 The Takeaway: Relational breakdown happens but you can grow through it.

To-Do This Week: Intentionally pray for any "ex-friends" (or friends you're currently struggling with) that God brings to mind this week.